Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Meg's Book - Chapter XXIX - Of Mice and Men

Trivia - There are a couple of scenes which I intend to include in the book that you haven't read yet. One of these deals with Melissa Lott becoming one of the wives of Joseph Smith after the events of August 1843. It was only recently that I realized Melissa got to the valley several days before Jonathan, and that Melissa's father was the un-named individual who told Mary Fielding Smith she was unprepared to travel west and would be nothing but a burden on the company. Mary predicted that she would reach the valley before this un-named individual (Cornelius Lott), and by the intervention of God, her prediction came true.

My muse originally objected to me calling the fort "the Old Fort." He was right. It was in researching the fort in response to his objection that I discovered the details about its sod construction, the damage the spring rains did to the structure, and the tales of the rodent infestations, where the movement of the rodents would cause the floors and walls to shake, there were so many of them. In the aftermath of the recent Brood X emergence (of 17-year locusts), Fairfax county experienced a striking increase in the local rodent population. So all the pieces were in place to connect the rodents with the cricket plague of May 1848.


Pat said...

Living through a plague of 'locusts' recently seems to have helped you appreciate the realities of the scene. I noticed that when the locusts appeared the previous emergence that there was a strange odor in the air, not the rot of meat, but still a stench of decay. You included the wider view successfully in this account, bringing Elivira's own experiences into the wider view. A few awkward places, one in which you use the word wall twice in close conjunction. Maybe she could move away from the 'wall' so he could mend the weathered 'structure'. But once again you have done a fine job with the story.

jl said...

I still very much enjoy reading each chapter as it comes to my "in-box." I recall that there were a few awkward sentences, but I cannot remember exactly what and skimming didn't jog my memory. Hopefully someone else will be of more help.

I LOVE THIS QUOTE!! “Sister Mary can pull miracles down from heaven the way the rest of us pluck fruit from trees in autumn. I don’t think she would be able to do that with a load of resentment on her heart...." I know of people like this and never found the right words to describe them. I now have a new saying. Thank you.

ktb said...

An outstanding chapter. I think the balance was great between what is hapening in the Fort, and what is happening with Elvira.

There was only one point where I stopped to think if I missed something, and that was when Jonahtan brought Elvira to their new home. Was that mentioned earlier he was building it, or that he was gone for periods of time that Elvira did not know about (building the house)?

daughterofheaven said...

I had mentioned in passing that Jonathan was gone for days at a time that winter helping to build the common buildings and prepare their home. But if you blinked, it would have been easy to miss.

I also plan to revise the end slightly to explain that Jonathan has only completed part of the house - enough to live in comfortably for the winter. In real history, they don't complete the stone house until spring 1850.

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